This is morning, it’s when I spend the most time thinking about what I’ve given up…..

Alright friends, it’s that time of year again when I make my annual Thanksgiving post, last year I made my post sitting on a burgundy sectional in Atlanta, having recently made the move a few months prior and really having to dig deep for things to be thankful for(here). This year, I’m home, and while life isnt perfect, and still hugely out of my control, I’m finding life to be moving more smoothly, and for that, I am definitely grateful.

This year I am thankful for all of the moments in life that have forced me to become an adult, I’m thankful for the cages, I’m thankful for the struggle, I’m thankful for being alone, for being beaten. I’m thankful for the opportunities to break through the cages, for the tools that have made the struggle easier, for the extended family I’ve built to keep me protected, I’m thankful for the bruises because they let me know I’m capable of keeping the fight alive.

I’m thankful for the loves I’ve had, especially when I’ve fought so strongly to keep my partners at arms length, I’m thankful for the ones who have dared to get close enough to teach me that relationships aren’t about me but about forgetting my selfish nature. I’m thankful for a refreshing outlook on another year, I’m thankful for finding a voice, Im thankful for my family, we are a strange crew but I never doubt that I am loved and protected, for my cousin Starr, and for beautiful and healthy godchildren.

 

My beautiful mother and myself.

Pappa.

Thankful for family, for Tab and my godson Brian.

Ruth, with a smile that kicks me in the face 🙂

I hope that this year I’ll be able to keep my attitude in check and keep moving towards the ultimate goal, it’s not about a career, a lover, a home, it’s about balance, I’m thankful that this year I find myself one step closer to balance, I’m still miles away but I’m trudging through and enjoying the journey.

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One response to “This is morning, it’s when I spend the most time thinking about what I’ve given up…..

  1. I’m so glad that you are so resilient and such a fighter! We love you and hope to see you soon!

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