Yesterday I woke up at 4 am and accompanied Heather to The Valley, where she dropped Dale off at his car. It’s 4:15 am, the sky is an inky, hazy purple, there is absolutely no sun, and while lounging in the back seat, smoking a ciggy, I watch other cars float by and I couldn’t help but feel like we were amongst a school of sting rays drifting through the the dark California morning.
Today is the day, last day in my loft, after my inspection at 4 pm, I no longer have a place to call my metropolitan home. Earlier in the week I was afraid to give up my loft, however, as I started getting rid of more and more of my furniture, as I started packing away my clothes, and eventually as I cleared out the knick-nacks that assembled my life in LA, I’ve realized my life isn’t this huge melange of things that I own, is about how I treat the relationships in my life.
I’m kind of at a loss these days, as each moment drips by, life as I know it continues to change, I feel completely out of control. I’ve given up my home, I’m loosing my friends, and putting my love life on hold, I’m begining to realize that its these moments in my life that produce the most fruit.
Today I stood in an empty loft remembering all of the fantastic parties I’ve thrown, remembering lazy Sundays in orange sheets, cooking dinner for friends, and long evenings relaxing in a tub full of bubbles. God damn, life is complicated, but I’ll never forget these precious memories that make life worth living.
And while I’d love to continue to sap-out and wax philosophic about my time in California, the past few days have left me beyond exhausted, so, I must leave it at good evening, and have a great Halloween.